The more social media gets ingrained in our day-to-day lives, and the more people live through their screens, the more superficial and out of touch they become with reality.
It’s no secret that the newer generations are growing up with phones in their hands before they can even walk. And with that, social media is in the picture by default, because that’s what most people use their phones for—social media consumption.
And what kind of content dominates social media? Stuff that triggers emotion. Because that’s what gets views, goes viral, and spreads like wildfire. You know what I mean—fancy cars, luxury vacations, money, muscles, women, status, celebrity drama. All the things that, in the real world, don’t actually provide real happiness.
You’ve heard the saying, right? “You become the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Well, in this era, you become the average of the content you consume online. And most content revolves around superficial things—looks, money, fame, status.
As a result, people put these things on a pedestal. And honestly, I don’t blame them. These are the things that grab attention, so by default, that’s what gets pushed in front of us. Meanwhile, the things that truly matter—the things that will improve your life the most—are often intangible.
Confidence, charisma, mindfulness, happiness—none of these are visible to the eye, yet they’re far more valuable than any materialistic thing combined.
Don’t get me wrong, money is essential. Without it, you can’t survive. But the luxury, the flashy stuff—it doesn’t actually bring happiness. It’s just social media brainwashing.
Take, for example, the popular trend right now: Looks, Money, Status. Social media pushes this idea that you need all three to attract beautiful women.
Yeah, I know—stupid, right?
A lot of people fall into this trap, thinking they need a significant amount of money, status, or model-tier looks. While there may be some truth to it, there’s something far more powerful than all of that combined.
Charisma.
Let me illustrate this with a personal story.
Storytime
Recently, I signed up for a part-time job as a developer (yep, I needed some stability while building out my business). The first thing I noticed was that part-time web developer jobs are almost nonexistent, but that’s beside the point.
After some searching, I found a few companies offering 24-hour contracts. One of them reached out to me pretty fast, so I jumped on the opportunity and scheduled a meeting right away. These opportunities don’t come often.
To my surprise, they invited me out for a coffee.
Long story short, I met with the CEO, and we went to a coffee shop (not the kind where they smoke weed, just a regular café). What instantly shocked me and left me in awe was his level of charisma.
Every single person he spoke to left with a smile. Even the café workers, who initially seemed grumpy, lit up as soon as he started talking to them. The way he spoke, the appreciation he had for others, and the humor he effortlessly injected into his conversations—it was unreal.
This, in my opinion, is power.
It’s something you can’t capture on camera. It has to be felt. It’s not something you can buy—it’s something you have to cultivate and develop from within.
The Lost Art of Charisma
I’ve always believed that charisma and social skills are keys to a happy and fulfilling life. And this experience reignited my passion for sharing and caring about others through charisma.
I also believe this is a skill everyone should invest in if they want to live an amazing life.
Especially in this current era.
We live in a time where people lack charisma. A time where materialism and superficiality are worshiped, and real, meaningful human interactions are neglected.
Yes, I preach fitness, and I will always prioritize my physique—but even I know that focusing only on the external is a fool’s game.
Not only are people valuing the wrong things, but they’re also neglecting the things that actually matter, like charisma.
Even worse—people are actively getting worse at socializing.
We’re so used to communicating through screens that we’re forgetting how to communicate in real life.
“The more we elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate.” – J.B. Priestley
Not only are we prioritizing the wrong things in life, but we’re also letting our most valuable traits deteriorate by not working on them.
And that’s how we’ve ended up with an era of empty people—people obsessed with money but lacking personality and charisma.
Why Charisma is Power
No matter how you look at it, we are social creatures. Meaning, our happiness is rooted in our interactions with others.
Not through a screen—but in actual, real life.
Love starts with meaningful conversations. Friendships begin with lighthearted small talk. People get hired because of the right connections made through conversation. And the foundation of all of that is charisma.
Charisma is power. Just look at history’s greatest leaders—they all had this one trait in common: the ability to make people like them. In other words, charisma.
People do things for people they like.
People respect the people they like.
People trust the people they like.
People love the people they like.
All of that is built through charisma. That is what power is.
And if you really think about it, people who chase superficial things like money, looks, or status subconsciously want the same things. They just go after hollow, temporary substitutes that ultimately destroy their charisma.
In today’s world, where people are becoming less and less charismatic, mastering this skill will set you apart.
Not only that, but it’s also more powerful—because it’s something that can’t be lost. It’s more pure because you’re giving something that’s a part of yourself.
The art of charm, the art of giving.
If you attract people with your money, status, or looks, those same people will leave you if you lose all of that.
But if you attract people with your charm, they will never leave—because it’s something that comes from within you. It’s something you’re giving to others.
It is the truest expression of yourself. It is who you are as a person.
But let me backtrack a little. Some people think charisma is about memorizing lines or putting on an act to appear more charismatic.
That’s not what charisma is in my eyes.
Charisma, to me, is the art of being yourself to the fullest—of giving your love, your energy, and your gifts to the best of your ability.
It might sound a little abstract or even spiritual, but allow me to expand on it.
In society, people tend to hold their true personalities back. When we talk to others, it’s like we have a mask in front of our faces. We speak and act through that mask. We hesitate to give genuine compliments from the heart. We’re afraid to express our deepest emotions.
At the core of all this hesitation is the fear of not being accepted. Society has conditioned us to play it safe, to avoid rejection at all costs. That’s why so many people fear talking to strangers—because they’re afraid of being rejected.
Now, this fear made sense millions of years ago. Back then, rejection could mean death—if you were cast out from the tribe, you couldn’t survive on your own. But in today’s world, that’s no longer true.
Yet, this fear still lingers. And it’s not just stopping us from approaching strangers—it’s stopping us from expressing our truest selves.
But if you can break free from that fear… if you can fully express your most authentic self… you’ll be able to make people like you in an instant. No need for looks, money, or status.
And the best part? You’re giving something pure. Something 100% you.
Something that can’t be taken away or bought.
That is what charisma is.
That is what truly matters in life and what you should prioritize. (And fitness—I’m still a gym dude.)
So… how do you develop this free-flowing charisma?
The 6 step Charisma Commands.
Step 1: Just Talk More
Charisma is built by exchanging words and energy. And both are only possible if you actually talk to more people. But charisma isn’t just about having random conversations—it’s also about body language, eye contact, composure, kindness, and overall presence.
Sounds like a lot? Well, if you know me even a little, you know I’ll always simplify things so that the only thing left to do is execute.
So here it is: Talk to more people. That’s it.
If you go to the store, ask the cashier how their day is going. If you’re at the gym, ask someone about their routine. Don’t stress too much about how you come across yet—your energy is probably trash in the beginning, but that doesn’t matter. Just improve with every interaction.
The core of this whole thing is to talk to more people. The more you talk, the more data you collect.
And with more data, you can actually do something with it—which brings us to the next step.
Step 2: Analyze & Identify
Now that you’re talking to more people, it’s time to analyze your interactions and identify weak points. Everyone has their own weaknesses when it comes to charisma. Some people barely make eye contact. Others talk way too fast.
Your job? Figure out your biggest weak spot.
Once you’ve identified it, work on it. Groundbreaking, right? Haha.
It’s really not rocket science. If you talk too fast, slow down. If you have weak eye contact, start making more eye contact.
To give you a starting point, here’s one of my biggest weaknesses and something I see a lot of people struggle with:
👉 Talking too much about yourself.
You want to avoid this at all costs. At the end of the day, people care about themselves—not you. They want to talk about their lives. It’s always better to be a good listener than a good talker.
That’s actually a golden charisma tip—people literally pay therapists just to listen to their lives and problems. That’s how powerful listening is.
But again, analyze your own weaknesses and work on them. If you don’t know where to start, become a better listener.
Step 3: Reduce Toxic Social Media
Once you’ve identified your weak points and started working on them, the next step is to cut down on toxic social media.
You might be thinking, What does social media have to do with charisma?
Everything.
The kind of content you consume matters. And if you’ve spent any time online, you’ve probably noticed how a lot of popular content is negative.
One trend I keep seeing? Those stupid videos where guys ask random women, “How much should a man make?”—and of course, they respond with some outrageous number.
So what does this do to the average guy’s mind? It warps his perception of reality, making him think that money is everything and that the world is against him.
And that’s just one example. The truth is, most social media content is negative, and that negativity rewires your subconscious.
This programming won’t just make you a miserable person—it’ll make you uncharismatic too.
So do yourself a favor: Reduce your social media consumption.
Step 4: Reduce Mobile Usage in Public
A lot of people say they don’t have many opportunities to talk to strangers.
Unless you live in the middle of the Sahara, that’s complete bullshit.
The real reason you think this way? Because you bury your head in your phone like an ostrich.
If you actually looked around while walking, you’d realize you pass by at least 50-100 people every single day.
Even more if you live in a city.
I even tested this myself—I work out at 6:30 AM in a small village gym, and I still talk to 8-10 people every morning.
So stop making excuses. Put your phone away, look up, and start acting like a human being before the smartphone era.
Bonus Benefit:
When you reduce mobile usage in public, you’ll be forced to be present in the moment. Using your phone all the time literally trains your brain to be distracted.
Less screen time = more presence = more charisma.
But you know what else massively boosts charisma?
Step 5: Give Compliments
“I love the color of your eyes, baby girl.”
No.
Do not give stupid compliments like that. Superficial, genetics-based compliments don’t work on girls—or anyone, really.
But when done right, compliments can supercharge your charisma. If done wrong, they’ll destroy it.
The key? No fake compliments. People can smell BS from a mile away.
So how do you make sure your compliments don’t feel fake? Here are a few rules:
👉 Avoid body-related compliments.
Don’t compliment someone’s eyes or any other genetic trait. Even if they’ve worked hard for their body, it’s better to compliment their discipline and fitness rather than their looks.
👉 Compliment achievements.
Instead of pointing out something anyone can notice, recognize their efforts and accomplishments. People love being acknowledged for their hard work. Be that person who gives them that recognition.
Train yourself to see the good in people. Complimenting others isn’t just about making them feel good—it actually trains you to be a more positive, charismatic person.
So in a sense you need to rewire your brain…
Step 6: Rewiring Your Brain
This is the stage I’m currently at in leveling up my charisma, and what I’m about to share is something that only a tiny percentage of people even know about—let alone have.
Like I mentioned earlier, due to social conditioning, most people aren’t being their true selves. They filter their words, suppress their authenticity, and adjust their personality just to avoid rejection.
This deep-rooted issue is only getting worse with the rise of social media, where toxic and negative content is constantly being pushed. People are becoming more pessimistic, more insecure, and more inauthentic.
This negativity programs your subconscious into a downward spiral.
So, what you need to do is unwire yourself and unf*ck your mind from all the mental and spiritual damage you’ve inflicted on yourself over the years. This takes real effort, but it’s critical if you want to take control of your own brain.
How to Rewire Your Brain
We all have negative thoughts, and those thoughts tend to multiply if left unchecked.
The key is to catch yourself when a negative thought appears and immediately counteract it with three positive thoughts.
For example:
❌ "I’m a broke loser."
✅ "Money doesn’t define me as a person."
✅ "Yeah, I’m broke, but I’m a broke winner."
✅ "Being broke right now is just part of my journey—it’s making me more resilient for my future rich self."
Sounds kinda woo-woo, right? But trust me—this sh*t works.
I’ve done this myself, and after a few months, my mindset completely flipped. You start noticing how many of your negative thoughts actually stem from the garbage you consume—which is exactly why I told you to cut out toxic social media in Step 3.
Last Words
Charisma is insanely powerful. I cannot emphasize enough how much of a game-changer it will be in your life.
In a world where people are becoming increasingly superficial, anxious, and uncharismatic, you will be an anomaly if you truly develop this trait.
It’s not just fulfilling for you—it will also impact everyone around you. People will gravitate toward you.
And the best part? It’s something you can never lose. Once you build real charisma, it stays with you for life.
Thanks for reading this, and I hope you take this seriously and cultivate this trait—because it will make your life f*cking amazing.